Why Gospel

Turning Point in My Life

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In 2002, on a cold and dreary October day, I was very depressed and had decided that I felt as though I had absolutely nothing left in my life to live for.  My mind was made up.  I decided that I wanted a pistol that would do the deed cleanly and permanently. I chose to look for a Desert Eagle 50cal; a pistol that would get the job done.  I began calling gun shops around the Kansas City area and found one; it was in Overland Park, Kansas. Growing up with guns I had once had a Colt 22 Woodsman target pistol. I came upon hard times when first married and sold it. It went out of production in the late 70s and it had been impossible for me to find another in good condition. I drove to the gun shop, entered and walked to the main glass gun-case and saw laying before me the pistol I had called about and needed to end my life; the 50cal Desert Eagle. While getting out my wallet to pay for the Desert Eagle I spotted the 22cal Colt Woodsman target pistol laying there that I had searched for, for many years. 

Now the decision. I really wanted to buy the 22cal and shoot it at least one last time for old times sake. But, I needed the 50cal to end it all. I ask the owner if I bought the Colt could I bring it back later and trade it for the Desert Eagle. He said yes. 

FIRST MIRACLE...... I purchased the 22cal Colt Woodsman target pistol and not the 50cal Desert Eagle.  I left with it intending to bring it back and exchange it for the Desert Eagle on another day.  I drove home and knew I had to find a hiding place for the pistol. Once inside, I went up to the top floor of our 5 level house in Shawnee, Kansas.  On the 5th level, was a 6 ft bookcase, and on the top shelf, it held my mother’s family Bible.  I thought to myself, what better hiding place from my wife than behind the large Bible. I pulled the Bible down and placed the Colt behind it. While putting the Bible back in place my mother’s Book marker fell out. She had died in 1995 of ALS. The marker had a picture of Jesus walking with angels. In my mother’s handwriting on the long edge of the marker were the words, “Walk with the Lord in the morning and He will walk with you all day long."

SECOND MIRACLE......  I opened her Bible to put the Bible marker back in place.

Looking at her Bible, I discovered that she had underlined and dated passages as she was dying of ALS.  Seeing the dates and noticing her deteriorating hand writing I wanted to read all of them in the order she underlined them.

I got a pad and made a list of all with the date and page numbers. Then entered them into an excel spreadsheet and sorted by date.  There were approximately 200 underlined passages. The latter ones, the dates, were hard to read due to her deterioration from ALS.

Third MIRACLE...... it was as if Mother was telling me how much she appreciated our Lord giving her the time she had here on earth.... and yet, I was about to take my own life. I was overcome with emotion and I went to my knees and prayed and that day, at that moment, I started a new life dedicated to our Lord. After giving my life to Christ I was given the original song, Look to the Lord. I also became a member of a local Church.  The Lord has continued to bless me by giving me lyrics and music to original Christian songs to share with others in hopes of showing others the joy one receives after accepting Jesus Christ as their Savior and having Jesus in their life.

Fourth MIRACLE...... I live today to praise His holy name.